her simple life

2010-01-03T08:53:00.001+08:00

MOVED!

vivacilious.wordpress.com

2009-12-02T07:42:00.003+08:00

super! i wanna watch sherlock holmes! (: the trailer looks good, tho i admit it looks like some money-making blockbuster (i didnt recall sherlock having such a thwarted sense of humour and that he can fight. i thought he's like more mental. hahahahaha. and he's supposed to look ugly/weird in the books!) ironman is super hot <33

Everybody sees it’s you.
I’m the one that lost the view.
Everybody says we’re through.
I hope you haven’t said it too.

So where do we go from here,
With all this fear in our eyes?
And, where can love take us now?
We’ve been so far down.
We can still touch the sky.

If we crawl
‘til we can walk again
Then we’ll run
Until we’re strong enough to jump.
Then we’ll fly
Until there is no end.
So let’s crawl, crawl, crawl
Back to love.
Yeah, back to love, yeah.

Why did I change the pace?
Hearts were never meant to race.
Always felt the need for space.
And now I can’t reach your face.

So where are you standing now?
Are you in the crowd of my faults?
Love, can’t you see my hand?
I need one more chance.
We can still have it all.

So we’ll crawl
‘til we can walk again.
Then we’ll run
Until we’re strong enough to jump.
Then we’ll fly
Until there is no end
So let’s crawl, crawl, crawl
Back to love.
Yeah, back to love, yeah.

i cant let my mum support me my whole life.

sometimes i think back. i have no ambitions, no dreams, no goals. whatever my parents have paved, i follow the path. it scares me, my lack of aim. and i owe alot to my parents.

some people just dont get it. its not easy for me to leave everything to my parents. they have 3 other kids they look it, and im by far the most rebellious.

i just want to grow up quick and spare my parents the agony. i want to take care of them for a change. im not going to let my ageing parents pay for my siblings on their own.

its crazy. i dont get it why people sacrifice so much for their children. weird thing, i dont think i mind getting abusive parents or something. it would make me less guilty about going off to take care of myself.

sometimes i envy my other friends who have alot of money. but whats money when its fully sponsored by your parents? you want to pave your own path and be somebody successful someday.

i just want to earn a sufficient amount to live, a halal source, to get hitched and take care of my siblings and possibly children. maybe do something to benefit society of course. but the answer's still not coming for me yet. so im waiting.

2009-11-18T09:59:00.006+08:00

my dear, if you know your dirty little secret, i wouldnt have agreed to be together with you!!!!

eeeee kedi!

the lesbian falls in love with the gay. ironic much?

IM FREEEEEEEE SOON! hahaha (after 23rd i hooray hooray already dont need to wait for the 3oth (:

BTW, i got alot of things to do!

1) prepare for PRRRRRROOOOOOM!
2)get a jobbbbb! either something to do with paperwork or handling kids. the others im not sure.
3)see what im gonna do for the future. my best guess would be going into NIE or journalism.
4)start on a list of all the ridiculous things i wanna do (one of them is to actually to see whether my sch uniform is fire-proof and sign up as a full-time syed stalker)

5) finish watching gokusen 2 and 3! (and watch the movie)

6)watch New Moon with my gals!

7)get out of sg. im thinking trekking or sumth. (not the Bukit Timah Nature Reserve, please!)

8)see what i can do for my girls (or specifically one girl)

9)convinced my dad to get me something that i can watch all my movies! (mp4 player or lappie)

inexhaustible list! will update for more things next time!

anyways, something caught my eye the day before. Michael Moore's new Capitalism: A Love Story. no! its not a freaking love story! its a documentary about you know? capitalism? its not really a topic im interested in, but something i would like to look forward to cause i really enjoyed Michael Moore's last documentary about the shooting in Columbine High. ok well basically its about why Americans have a high rate of murders and violence and whatnots. his theory is that because in the US, its legal to keep armed weapons and you can buy a packet of bullets just like that in a hair salon (wtf?!) i mean, seriously! i remember mr sim actually talking about parents who kept their gun in the house and two siblings were fighting and they were so angry that the 9 year old just took the gun and shoot the 4-year old in the head. OMG seriously. i mean im sure he didnt know the consequences of his actions but its kinda scary if you think about it. there's other stuff in that documentary and i seriously thought that was a real eye-opener, yknow? so im looking forward to Capitalism (though i bet its gonna be so boring about the Financial Crisis blah blah blah. so econs.)

Capitalism: A Love Story is a 2009 American documentary film directed by and starring Michael Moore. The film centers on the financial crisis of 2007–2009 and the recovery stimulus, while putting forward an indictment of the current economic order in the United States and capitalism in general. Topics covered include Wall Street's "casino mentality", for-profit prisons, Goldman Sachs' influence in Washington, DC, the poverty-level of many airline pilots, the large wave of home foreclosures, and the consequences of "runaway greed".[1] The film also features a religious component where Moore examines whether or not capitalism is a sin and if Jesus would be a capitalist.[2] The film was widely released to the public in the United States and Canada on October 2, 2009.

omg why am i babbling about these stuff when econs paper is like 3 hours away! gosh bleargh! but seriously, i think i just broke my personal record for information overload. im so gonna be like that guy who blanked out during his paper and could only write his name (idk who the guy is but everybody keep using it as an example). ok blah blah blah back to econs.

2009-11-18T09:42:00.003+08:00

when it doesnt feel right, it doesnt feel right, it doesnt feel right.

i can count the amount of people that ive had so many arguments, fights, whatevernots. sometimes i wonder whether its just me, or maybe im just the kinda girl who can get pushed around, used and the shits. i can count the amount of people who always seem to be there for me but just pushed a knife behind my back in the end. but i just get up, get up, get up. cause it aint worth it, YOU're not worth it.

i always thought that as an individual, you see life through your own eyes. you may have a lot of friends, and there's always something that you dont like about another. it doesnt matter, cause everyone has their own weaknesses and prejudices, nobody is an angel. but sometimes i just start to wonder whether you give a thought about others, whether you treat me as a friend, or whether you are just USING me. (and just throw me out after you're done?)

2009-11-15T19:19:00.004+08:00

hello!

bad timing i know, but im addicted to GOKUSEN!

the movie's coming out soon, cant wait.

(yeah, jap serial show)

matsumoto jun (sawada shin) is super hotttt!!!! :DDDDD

normally i hate guys with emo fringes, but the way he carry himself is like so coooool. AWESOME :D

its a good stress relief, really! go watch!

HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT :DDDDD

2009-11-08T20:12:00.002+08:00

im so angry with myself.

no matter what you do, i cant stay mad at you long enough.

&im just starting to doubt this whole thing.

2009-11-07T08:49:00.001+08:00

i should not be doing this... but this is the cutest thing ive ever seen! :DD

2009-10-30T16:13:00.001+08:00

i was studying ( i promise!) when my eyes caught this. poor girl. i pity her...

2009-10-23T04:10:00.001+08:00

Tell me what it is
Tell me what you need to hear
I'll find a way to mean it
I'll change the world the way you like
If only anything there was that
I could do
To melt your heart
That is hard for me

How far & how long must I go?
Without a taste of love fulfilled
Not bittersweet
The way I feel when you are near
Is love
And gives me reason to endure
Whatever comes

2009-10-14T09:47:00.002+08:00

seriously, take responsibility and dont shove it on others.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?...We are all meant to shine, as children do...It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
Nelson Mendela

i was watching youtube on my favourite reporter at The Resident (woo!) when i realised that she is saying something that might make sense.

when we think about the homeless, the sick, the deprived and the whatnots, we always keep thinking that everyone else may be worse than them and you feel so much better. but why do we always look upon others to make ourselves better? is it a fuel for our ambitious wants and needs? why me? is it possible that all of us experience the same amount of happiness or sadness throughout our lives?

happiness is, afterall, a state of mind. it doesnt require physical wealth or status (though others may rightly oppose this notion), fame or power. what makes us happy is subjective. something that makes me happy may not be shared by others, or is not enough for others. so how rightly can you say that someone who is in destitution is not as happy as someone in the MacWorld? (poverty vs obesity) i mean, there was this passage in Prelim 2 where it says that people in South Africa (issit?) likely to bne happier as they translates to community as a whole whereas people living in the media-world would most likely find their happiness watching behind the black screen. no more communication or whatnots. but is it really true?

"someone who does not search for happiness will most likely to find it" our ambition, our desire to be at the top may as well propel us to be selfish and self-indulgent. will we truly find happiness in this way, spending hours delving into work and papers and sheets and no human contact at all? cause afterall, we are human.

i use to think alot about the negatives in my life (still thinking) why things happen this way, why cant i get born into a richer family, why i dont have less siblings, why did i put myself back into the unmerciful hands of our education system, why why why why why? why do we human beings just love to talk about ourselves, speak about ourselves, indulge in our small problems when there are just tiny fragments in our lives?

it is because we are human after all. but gone are the altruistic aims. only self-indulgence and vanity. sometimes we need to take a step back and revive our emotional and spiritual beings.

i like to self-involve myself too. according to mr sim, those who make blogs are those people who like to shine spotlights on themselves, badgering on attention o.0

so seriously, what makes you happy?

anyways, this is a short clip on my fav reporter's view on the media. which i totally, totally agree! :D

seriously, dont you think entertainment is really getting old? eg. reality shows. and the most recent Singapore Idol Take-over. its fun to talk about how "racist" Sg Idol is because the last 2 idols are Malay (whaaaaat?!) or laugh about how bad Singaporean talent is compared to other countries, blah de blah. but its all what? pure entertainment. suddenly all the head-lines about serious, real stuff totally disappear. the fine line between news and entertainment has eroded.

and anyway, bout the racist stuff (that came from a Chinese perspective). just remember its 90% popularity and 10% talent. we Malays like sing-a-ling-a-lings and karaoke nights (sorry, KBox too expensive) or singing under the blocks with our jiwang mats and their guitars- it all came from the kampong days when there is no TV and we sing the repetitive Chan Mali Chan songs. seriously, when it comes to all this, we just love all these stuff. really.

so when you people like to talk about how Malays are given the edge over others, seriously?! this is SINGAPORE we are talking about. just because im Malay does not mean i advocate Malaysia's priorities on Malays, so dont give me that look. im not the government. im just somebody. or maybe nobody (since nobody is perfect) hahahahahahahaha k lame wth.

2009-10-10T03:12:00.003+08:00

useless post.

huahua. having mass outing today. find us at wdl regional library today for the small marathon starting outside the library gate at 10 sharp. please do run like the kiasu singaporeans that we are. cya there! k shut up aisyah. o.0 ohhh. and i talked to ami. been a long time since i did and i got some gossip. hahahahaha! weird thing is that GUYS are the one who have gossips, not us GIRLS. weird right.

and oh, come on, go easy on Obama will you? not that easy to run the biggest economy in the world. ok second biggest. SERIOUSLY! i mean its recession PEOPLEZ!! sorry i noe im very biased haha.

ohhh i found my new heartthrob since chris brown seems to be out of the story. i keep hearing this song on the radio and i had a hard time finding this song lah! love the vid <3

So baby don’t worry, you are my only,
You won’t be lonely, even if the sky is falling down,
You’ll be my only, no need to worry,
Baby are you down down down down down,

2009-10-03T08:09:00.002+08:00

more disturbing thoughts.

why is innova still having mass consultations at this time? ok i know that these days the consultations are used to go through prelim papers but we all know that these mass consultations are not working, as can be seen from the wonderful results that we have.

1. students have to go home at 5.10-6.40 on three days. this means that almost all the time, we're too exhausted to study at home cause, well, we're exhausted.

2. it seems that the mass consultations, the teachers sometimes decide to use it as extra tutorial. so in addition to the hw we alrd have, we have more extra hw, which adds to our exhaustion cause we have to burn midnight oil to finish it up.

3. when there is mass consultations, hundreds of students taking up the same subject will sit in the same LT and there are only about 10 teachers. so then? i see teachers running around desperately and the other 300 students not being attended to doing their own work. NOT EFFECTIVE.

4. on days when we are free from those, which is wednesday and thursday for most science students, the teachers get booked very fast cause ALL THE SCIENCE STUDENTS ARE TAKING THE EXACT SAME THING AND THEY HAVE THE SAME EXACT TEACHERS!

5. furthermore, there are studies that show students can only concentrated fully from 30-45 minutes only. i get very sleepy and tired esp when we have lessons at 5-6pm. this is seriously not conducive. if we cant concentrate from 1 full hour, what makes you think we can concentrated for 12 hours straight?

solutions:
1. shorten our tutorials and replace them with timed practices. thats what we lack. especially for science students. we dont really have to tackle hard questions. a level is standardized so they must not be very hard but neither must it be ver easy. so what we need is accuracy. score the MAXIMUM marks for each question. (hail john ng! i swear i worship him after he said that) at the end of the day, its not how much work u have done for your a level, its what you do at the a level paper.

2. have faith in us. i know that innova is going 4-5 years old, and its the "new kid on the block", but i find that some teachers dont have that kind of faith on us,especially when it comes to my class. yes, i agree that we're not as good as other students, but lets think about it. this batch has the best average L1R5. my class has an average of what? 14-15? our teachers come from different jcs, some of them come from very established jcs, so we should be doing alright what. maybe teachers dont have the faith in themselves to bring us to a higher level ): thats what im really afraid of.

my class comprises of extremely hardworking and smart people. we're just not as KIASU as some of the other classes. but it doesnt mean that we dont study you know.

"Across the econs cohort, there is significant improvement for qn6 except 23C. I mark 23A, 23B, 23D and 23E. A lot of students from these classes are getting 16-19/25 region. the gap between this 4 classes and 23C is widening.

I have to tell you that 23C is the last class among the 23 series. You have to buckle up now and burn lots of midnight oil to pass your A levels.

3. ok i got no more ideas. my brain hurts and i need to go do hw.

there's seriously nothing we can do about the wastage of resources cause we only have less than 40 days left. so now? have faith in yourselves.

i wanna go ask ms ang on vectors. anyone else wanna join? im seriously weak at vectors.

and thanks boon ee. (: some of my maths concepts are cleared thanks to you. jy okay? (: you have so much ability and talent, and all you need to do is to expand it. <333 seriously! ily! (:

another thing, please read mr foo's articles. most of us dont have the ability to write profound english like arts students and there are many econs terms that we cant take from gp. okay? (:

i know he is _____, but right now we have to expand our resources. im asking for his help. though i may not agree with what he says sometimes, he really stimulates thinking and give good resources.

i seriously idk how to help. though how plain and coarse the truth may be, its just how we study. we've been studying so hard. and it comes to this? so maybe have to change strategy? idk.

2009-10-01T04:06:00.008+08:00

finally, move over (:

sorry, i couldnt help posting this up. this is funny. o.o

i really feel bad for her, amidst all the credit card theft and whatevernots. and she's withdrawn from the title. but seriously, the damage is done. o.O

hahahahha oh now i get the BOOMS part.

ohh and in case you didnt know, she actually won the title. but was dismissed or pulled herself out.

http://news.asiaone.com/News/AsiaOne%2BNews/Crime/Story/A1Story20090924-169805.html
http://www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/singaporelocalnews/view/1008079/1/.html

SERIOUSLY?! how did she even get chosen in the first place! what i dont like about her is that she actually didnt tell the managerial authority about her past situation until she was found out.

gosh.

but anyway, dont you really think she's an epitome of a typical Singaporean? broken Eng, kiasu, cheap, pretentious and whatevernots? i can see myself in at least 2 of these words.

2009-09-11T09:59:00.002+08:00

i read the Time Traveller's Wife AGAIN. something tells me that the movie is so not gonna reach the standards of the book. the book make me tear alot of times and theres too many scenes that i really like. esp the last part where clare met henry back when she was 84 years old. i cant imagine having to wait that long, for a few minutes of his time. sorry, not as crazy as clare. haha (:

so yeah. i dont wanna watch the movie. gonna get disappointed.

had a bad throbbing headache yesterday, along with my ever-resistant cough and flu back after the poole outing. READ: dont ever drink coffee after drinking milk when your immune system is down. geesh.

i cannot wait for my freedom. no way in hell am i ever gonna take any exam like this again.

addiction to saint's row: bad timing to get addicted to xbox o.0

2009-09-03T05:59:00.003+08:00

saya mau watch! :DD

anyways. final destination too looks gory. i hate gory stuff. apparently living in the age of New Media has not desensitized me :P

2009-08-23T01:08:00.002+08:00

HMPH!

im not doing his work.
im not doing his work.
im not doing his work.

we're facing prelim 2 in 2 weeks. dont freak ok. ive got like, 10 days to gp paper?

its not helping that 2 days we finish at 6.40, 1 day we finish 5.10 and 2 other days we have to use for personal consultation.

its really not. im exhausted as hell.

and i miss mr sim as our ct. he may not always be the best around, but he doesnt SHOUT at us for no apparent reason.

im not angry with f__. im just... i dont know. we dont take mcs for granted, we really dont. but its the stress thats mounting up on us thats causing all the absentees. its not as if we're on truancy mode or sumth. really, he gotta look at it this way. only ONE or TWO people in this ppl may have dont such things, but there's no sense in scolding the whole class until the first level classes can hear cause its just gonna make us hate him more.

furthermore, the way he says things make me feel so humbled. as a class, its better to push up the morale of the students instead of shooting us down. i feel like not coming for pre-2 econs for fun. HAHA! now that'll be a riot!

how does forcing us to do essays that we have the model answers for help us i wonder? 3 for his tut. and im only starting on lect essay, which is 2. "improve the answers" hmmm! its MODEL essay. MOOOOOOO DEEEEEL essay. k ada paham? when the answer's in front of me, i will just grab it anddddd copy. and the workload's just too much.

since 3 days ago, ive stopped doing his work. he can blah de blah for all he wants.

ok lah, maybe i just do detailed outline.

im just ranting for fun. its stress relief.

2009-08-23T01:05:00.001+08:00

5 econs essays.

5 econs essay = 10 mini essays.

in one weekend.

wait.

5 econs essays.

FIVE econs essays?

2009-08-14T07:23:00.002+08:00

im sorry if im frank, obstinate, straightforward, blunt.

lets pause here okay, for a while.

first of all, what is your purpose of writing me all the emails?

is it to make me forgive mel? according to you, she has done nothing wrong. so what is there to forgive?

is your purpose to make both of us get back together? do you think im going to forgive her after you screwed, harrassed and plagued my friends?

is your purpose to make me "change into a better person"? cause you knoe, it wont happen. even if it happens, its not because of this.

is your purpose to make me feel humiliated? bad? you've done whatever you could... thats like 13 emails worth of nonsense.

tell me what you want, zubir.

cause i dont understand.

if you've done your deed, just leave. go away. get lost. move on.

i'll like to think you care for me as a "person". but thats nonsense. so tell me.

2009-08-11T23:44:00.002+08:00

thank you. so so much.

thank you for giving me your kind attention to everything that i have uttered. thank you loving me (: thank you for letting me abuse me and misuse you.

im sorry. for being such an immature bitch sometimes. it happens when you're with someone 3 years younger than you. age gap ah. but you tolerated me well, and i dont know how you did that. if i were to date myself, i would have dump myself long time ago.

im sorry that you have to listen to the endless nonsense from my mature and immature friends. im sorry that you have to be there to hold me in your arms almost everytime. im sorry for being such a drama queen and im just sorry for being me. the most sorry ever.

how did my birthday go? like shit. some people just cant let it go for one day. i need a hug. (:

nobody have ever done the things that you do for me. nobody will ever run up and down the neighbourhood in search of my thief snatcher. baby, you're just so amazing (: but please, dont bash up the wrong person.

i need panadol. coffee. maybe you. my consolation after getting some harrassing emails, seeing my best friend fight another best friend, and getting my phone snatched and running barefooted in the middle of the night in pursuit of the attacker is that i have you. and you and you and you and you... and that will never change.

i'll try to change myself for the better. but you gonna give me your love (:

2009-08-08T14:33:00.002+08:00

personal statement.

im still not yet 18. im a teenager, with so much imperfections. i have so many things i want to change myself about. i dont mind when people tell me my weaknesses cause obviously i do have them.

but these days ive become much too opiniated, too much ego in my veins, too much self-absorption maybe. i realised that when im a mindless blonde people tend to befriend me more. lines of communication have deteoriated, and i wonder why.

ive lost so many friends in the process cause they have changed too much, or they were like that before and i only spoke up now.

two people in question; i wanted me to fcuk off and the other wanted me to help her. her in question is an ex-friend of mine.

this is pretty much whether i want to put myself in front of her, or her in front of myself. im not sure who to believe, but i think she's suffering.

i just wish somebody would make decisions for me, cause im lost.

2009-08-08T12:49:00.003+08:00

i realised that im just one sadistic, cynical girl.

please dont sue me.

when i was fairly an adolescent, i totally adore watching the National Day Parade behind the screen of the black box. i just love singing those patriotic songs out loud ( i still do, made a fool out of myself during the National Day Celebrations in IJC) and mimicking those hand gestures especially from 'We Will Get There'.

two National Days ago, i just lost interest in NDPs. i find that they always seems to be doing the same thing over and over again. sure, they may have changed the performance, but its just practically the same. seen 16 NDPs, seen them all. or maybe i just hate to share my birth month with Singapore (mine is 2 days after) hurhur.

maybe i just hate the way how the little red dot dramatizes everything, for example. the NDP. cliched much? people chasing for tickets, queueing up all the way from sundusk to sunset. though i think the performers, many of whom have practiced from the BEGINNING of the year, do deserve a big credit. however, thousands of them do not get the credit they deserve, being shrunk to little dots on the grassy field.

what do they get for getting into NDP? im not sure its a valuable item to put onto your testimonials or your School Graduation Certificates. please do not tell me you go there for the free goodies. though i admit its nice. my parents sometimes have to guard the posts during National Day and they always throw in a few of those back home.

so, Singapore is multicultural multilingual multi-whatevernots, a mass of foreign citizens with "hopes" (rolling my eyes). and basically gaining independence since only 1965, is a small country with not much history laid on it. what have we got to be patriotic about? oh wait. the Japanese conquering us and British colonialism. "we have no rights... we have no say... we long to be free one day..." is that really true? it just sounds like a soap opera to me. i didnt recall any mass killings or genocide happening around here.

so then people tell me why they love Singapore. i just love the way how "kiasu-ism" is overused in so many ways. its not a GOOD TRAIT. its a BAD trait!!! sure, when people become selfish and only care for their own good. is that something we Singaporeans should be proud about? i dont think so.

i dont like the way where the Singapore education is mainly based for our knowledge-based economy. i dont like all the elitist nonsense, i hate all the pushing parents i see at the libraries staring down their 8-year old kids to do their math
when what they should do is sit down and read a damn good book. and we wonder WHY they seem not to have a childhood.

im not sure, when i delved into the job sector, whether i will still change my mind, cause frankly, i dont know what to say to all this.

i dont understand why people would want to hoo-ha over some old man wearing "unappropiate" attire to the park. i dont understand why people would complain about getting fined for eating a sweet in MRT, cause really, you should have seen it coming.

i consider myself to be a Singaporean. but i just loathe it when i see all the hoo-ha around here sometimes. its just like another bad soap opera.

there are many things i love about Singapore. the food, the culture, the environment, the peace, (sometimes) laughing at the kiasu people queuing up for the FREE today paper in the MRT, joke about the big Durian which im not sure how and why it became part of the Sg identity, i just love the different people in this whole city and MANY MANY more. i love my friends, family, and my Bangla, and frankly ive a good life. i cant complain much, however the part about patriotism blah blah blah just doesnt occur right to me.

so the only thing i ruled as maybe "correct" (or politically correct) is that Singaporeans are still trying to find their identity, be it individual or national. we have so little to be proud of, so little to be happy about, that we grasp the few thick lines of patriotism. thats basically what Singapore is about i guess. a few dots of people in a bigger but still small red dot, in the middle of Asia, trying to find who they are, what their past is about.

cause basically, if you just cant do one simple thing, thats is say the pledge at 8.22 pm on 9 August 2009, what else can you do?

PS: im still NOT singing the theme song this year... sounds like somebody tried to blend in patrotic and Secondhand Serenade (and SS is my favourite band, so dont ruin it!) even if i do sing, im telling you im crossing my fingers behind my back. hmph!

2009-07-27T05:27:00.003+08:00

Obama is such an amazing speaker. so moving, the charm and confidence, the tenacity in which he carried out his speeches, is damn, well-lauded. i wanna speak like him. whoah!

his ideas are just so good i still cant grasp whether this is seriously gonna happen or not. i hope he brings changes cause he has brought much hope to many American's hearts. and seriously, if someone like b___ comes up again, i'll barf my heart out. :O

anyways, i cannot wait for new moon to come out! :P

haha! just kidding!!!!! original trailer:

though you gotta admit the guinea pig was funny. :O but anyways, if bella doesnt want jacob, i want him!!!! :D its kinda sad at the last book though, ): Taylor Lautner is just super mouth-watering... (whoops... dont tell my boyfriend that (:) see what i mean? i'll pick the werewolf over the "Greek God" vamp anytime! (:

2009-07-22T05:03:00.004+08:00

morning folks!

seeing as how i seriously dont wanna start on the 25-mark econs essay, i shall digress for a while.

so anyway, due to the H1N1 case, my sch has closed up all its side gates and open the main gate. IT DOES NOT HELP THAT the main gate is at the BACK of the school. (who puts the front gate at the back? ditto.) it also does not help that the bus at the main gate only operates from 4.30-6.30! its totally nonsense i tell you! i can spend 30-45 minutes just to reach wdlands mrt. do you know how big my sch is??? i DO NOT get it. why? why cant you just put a security guard at the main side gate?! like, 80% of the students go out from there. result: people are climbing the fence. (urgh... worse than rock-climbing) and you wonder who to blame here.

it also does not help that im not in good terms with the pakcik guard at the front. why, will you ask? i consider myself very patient with the old guy. it just started because me and saf and faus were making noise outside the gate. but he doesnt disturb saf or faus. he just likes to pick on me. padahal before that i was on good terms with him. so he starts talking to me rudely and commented on things that, seriously, tak perlu seyh! who are you, sia? i dont comment on your behaviour, so dont comment on mine. to each of their own. its my deal with my God. i dont comment on him EATING OPENLY during the fasting month last year. and dont talk about age, please. my grandpa is like waaaaaaaay older than him and he fasts with such ferocity. this guy just sits at his post and walk around the school like the Prime Minister of Singapore. no reason. AT ALL.

so yesterday i just retorted back at him rudely. i think he was shocked, but damn, he deserved it ok! even angels like ____(ok i cant think of anyone, so lets just leave the blank), when taunted and seeing his ugly macam paham face everyday, will be angry, so why not me? i hope it doesnt come to worse. (i could always climb...) maybe i should ask ahmed to come pick up from the front and start openly molest him (haha!) since from my previous conversations with him (when he was still civilised to me), thats what he hates the most. quote, "nie budak2 sekolah nie eh pegang sana pegang sini tak ingat mak bapak!" (i didnt know what to comment on this cause i think im one of those guilty ones... HAHAHAHAHA) i can always smooch with saf. i think that would anger him more... *starts to scheme*

i understand, people are not perfect. he's of seniority, but i expect him to be worth of his age. yet he acts like someone my age. tu lah, hang out banyak sangat ngan budak2 umur kitorg.

whew! that off my chest, i feel MUCH MUCH better.

ok, my eyes caught on this. if you are religious, please ignore me. im somewhat a liberal person. my strongest belief is that everyone should have their right to freedom of speech, to make choices, to do what they believe are in their best interests. yes, Power to the People! on the religious side though, im somewhat neutral. believe me when i say you shouldnt know alot about me.

but i dont get it when drinking becomes prone to bring caned. though i do agree that the model did something wrong religiously, but cmon man, isnt that taking things a lil too far? i think that whatever you do is like, between you and Allah (or God, for that matter). advicing is one thing, this is like forcing. if the person does not believe or have faith in the same thing than you do, you leave Allah to decide for the punishment, right? who are we to decide who to punish, who to cane, who to kill? fine, i agree that she's totally stupid ah. if you know you cant drink in Msia, why take the risk right? but what next, really? i know other Islamic countries had it bad. i was reading this book on the African Race Riots in 04. and its scary. i wonder if people will start sentencing people to death for not being Muslim.

yes, me talk too much. i needa go prepare for school. toodles!

2009-07-16T01:43:00.003+08:00

goals:
lose my kgs.
MUG for A's.
spend time wit loved ones.

THATS IT!
i dont wanna think about anything else.

i shall be anti-social. cause some people are not worth talking to.

i despise ppl who treat others like shit just because we're not smart enough. and i wonder why i succumb myself to such torture.

seeing my apparently sucky results, im just motivated to do better. but wtv la. semangat ayam sahaja.

im turning to one of those scary 11-12 series muggers.

2009-07-12T12:18:00.004+08:00

movies ive finally watched:
Night in e Museum 2 (amazing! i like!)
Land of e Lost
A Walk to Remember
She's Just So not into You
The Proposal (dang! this funny!)
Transformers (its getting old.. seriously)

movies i wanna watch today:
Duplicity

movies i had rented/wanted to watch but i just dont feel like doing it now:
Hannah Montana (shut up ok! i knoe this is wtv o.0)
Obsessed (beyonce's acting... thats the only thing im interested at)
Ghost of Gf's Past
Angels n Demons (its too long! i cant find the right time!)

tell me if any of this aint good.

on hold:
the GP Prelim practice (the compre is diff... and im stuck)

what im doing right now:
waiting for Samantha Swift and the Roses of Athena to download.
played Samantha Swift and the Golden Touch and its fabu... i love the 3D graphics and watnots. its a girls game so yeahhh... i got this thing for thrillers/detective games which explains my obsession with Nancy Drew when i was young...

why im writing a list:
coz i feel like i need to get my life organized... im just too much of a lazy bum (not really a goat, dear)... ok this is weird...

what i have been up to:
straddling the com being an internet geek... and thinking about some Bangla who sells kebabs... haha!

okok later!

2009-07-10T16:26:00.003+08:00

this is super sad. ))):

go watch. cried bucketfuls. (if you have love cooties, AVOID!)

i think shane west looks like edward cullen. hawt dang! (:

2009-07-06T03:19:00.009+08:00

i feel like watching BPGHS's Musical Revelry. it sounds good. BP plays are always good and i so wanna GO!!! never watched a play on Nadim before, have you? i need to get in touch with my inner melayu soul... HAHAHAHA! however i am damn paiseyh to go alone, so does anyone else wanna go pls pls pls? its this sunday and i think we have to book tickets from mr sazali... ):

2009-07-03T04:57:00.004+08:00

exams just DRAINS you.

they are TRYING to kill us. wait, scratch that, they are DETERMINED to kill us.

missed gp coz i was on mc.
econs case study wasnt so bad.
math paper 1 was a killer.
WELL, thats not surprising. everytime i took an innovajc H2 maths paper, i always feel that way. like wth! pretty sad cause in sec sch, maths used to be my fav subject (despite vlee n all) and i can dig that. but honestly! jc maths takes killer into a whole new level altogether.
physics was a surprise. i dont think its HARD. usually physics paper is undoable, but yest's paper was do-able, just that im not very prepared w the type of qs they ask.
so yeah.today's chem paper! OMG OMG! im scaring myself shitless. 8+4+10 chapters? im shitting my pants out. im so NOT prepared.

3 more papers next week and im off-duty. gawd do we all need a rest.

on a lighter note, i guess its kinda preparing us for prelims. its like forcing us to fail our first prelim so we will study like mad for A's. im sure going to.
i cant believe i got 3 weeks and i STILL didnt finish e syllabus.

ok enough enough.

anyways. i knoe this is a tad too late cause her bdae was 1 mth ago but we were all too wrapped up in pre-u sem at that time. so shoutout to faiszah! (:

since pae 0823c all the way till now. happy 19th dearie! (yes! i noe... i still not M18! you wait ah... 2 more mths! haha!) thanks for the listening ear, the pat in the back(or stomach), the memories! :DD im so gonna miss you when we leave ijc, babe! :D sometimes you can so totally read my mind! our shared interest in songs... all those crazy "mature" (ahem) jokes, the kiasu spirit in everything that you do, the fact that you cannot stop talking once you start, everything that just makes us go, "sungguh! oh, thats so faiszah!" i will miss smacking your ass and disturbing you until you go all mad (sorry ah, i cant help it. my nature) and im gonna miss hearing you yapping in class and running away from your wrath... so yeap! love ya! <33333

oh! and happy bdae to hudsy too! :DDDDD thank you for being such a crazy ass! and yes, you do laugh a lot.
aisyah: hi huda!
huda: [laughs] haha! hi aisyah!
aisyah: ermmm... why are you so happy?
huda: [laughs] ....
its like every sentence and she laughs. o.0
ok, and i noe ur going thru a mid-life crisis (teenage-life crisis) but we're all going thru e same stress babe! you wont knoe stress until u take chem! (haha wth) so chill yo. and remember that some things are just worth much more attention than others. yang bab kawin tu, put aside first ah eh! haha!!!!!! what matters is the a's man. the A's and the As that we're aiming... A..A...A...A...

oh and happy bdae nina! so long nvr see you, babe.

and i dont care ah! after next week all of you people better go out with me! no more excuses! hmph!

im sorry guys for being so distant. my school exam ah. sometimes i think its just innova.

Speak with your tongue tied,
I know that you're tired
But I just want to know,
Where you want to go,I may be sad,
But I'm not weak,
This situation is bleak
And you puffy eyes never lie,
Your tears come from inside.

Until Sunday I'll be waiting for an answer
I guess that yesterday's not good enough for you,
You know that I hate this song,
You know that I hate this song
Because it was written for you

Drown your fears with me
I'm feeling real sorry
Your glossy eyes don't need
The sadness they have seen
But you're way too deep to swim
Back up again
But somehow I can't find
The moment you said goodbye

This is becoming a problem
I'm hurting it's unfair
But somehow your words,
The way that I heard are haunting me,
You're under my skin
You're breaking in,
And the tasteless fights that filled our nights
Are starting to cave in,
You're under my skin
You're breaking in
And if Sundays what it takes to prove
I have nothing else to lose

im lost in your eyes,
so deep was it that i get lost in its mysteries (:
and the magic of your touch
it can unlock doors, can unravel secrets
gentle and teasing, assuring me of comfort (fine la, i lazy to think so i plagarize my own writing in my multiply)
so why dont you
just get out of your twisted hole
join me in our fantasy world
even if the grass isnt greener on the other side
even when i stand on the edge of the 12th storey preparing to jump
even if we dont last forever
i'll stay one night just to watch you sleep
cause every moment with you
is the best moment ever (:
xoxo aisyah (:

2009-06-28T18:31:00.002+08:00

i dont know what ur trying to do.

please stop disturbing me and go disturb other innocent unaware girls.

2009-06-22T13:05:00.004+08:00

bull.

im not sure whether to be scared or amused.

hot song (: so unlike the songs they have played. i think they are getting better and better.

2009-06-22T02:07:00.002+08:00

i hate it when i screw up my life and only have myself to blame. dang!

looking back, i feel like ive done alot of things but ive not. k wth. arghhh have faith have faith we'll get thru prelims (:

be strong, cause we gotta move on.
i dont want to see you like this, i really dont.

2009-06-18T09:23:00.002+08:00

i think hidayat is right. finally i got hold on to someone real, someone right, and i got to cage him. HAHA! wth. kesian si romeo da masuk sangkar. duh.

i wanna watch Land of the Lost (though some got bad comments abt it), ghosts of the gf's past, Transformers?? i just watch Night of the Museum 2 and its DAMN NICE! go watch. rooney, u dum dum!

yeah, and sorry abt my msn. (:

oh the toots just came back from malacca. i feel strange w.o the toots arnd. the hse is damn quiet (not that i dont appreciate it of course)

i miss faus, faiszah, sr n saf. wonder what they've done this hols. hmm.

pics up later.

2009-06-10T08:16:00.001+08:00

somehow or rather, i gotta do well for my prelims. i got to.

come what may.

2009-06-09T08:59:00.002+08:00

when you know somebody is doing something wrong, and you know it is not in your hands to interfere, you say, "im happy that you're happy." and i hope you'll find peace my good friend.

looking back, there are so many things i could have done better. so many decisions that pulled me away. lost friendships and lost hope. nothing else i could do but never look back but face the future.

hot dang! just got to watching Confessions of a Shopaholic. rocks!

2009-06-07T10:22:00.005+08:00

i miss the MSC (Beachers) ppl rite now. the 19 SPFs there rock! jiansheng faiszah saf roshini diyana azyan fashiha krishna nandhini ennoi peizhen pamela shawn jingkang sophia fatin! (: im gonna miss them. and dave too. (: this is so like kota tinggi with aniq and edmund. once we got together and bond, we aint gonna see them again? ok maybe. but i'll treasure the memories. (:

went hiking at bukit timah with aisha, dina, fairus and hidayat yesterday. its so beautiful in the morning. :D wish ahmed was there. he's a sucker for nature and natural sceneries. parks eh!

nice right? i like the colour. sadly, hidayat spoilt the pic by being inside. haha k kidding. dont kill me!

our picnic spot. :) cool transition. we hiked for 2-3 hours straight. hot dang! i wanna do it again! from bukit timah to macritchie if possible. loves!

supposed to study with aisha after that but both of us fall asleep. so went to meet ahmed. (: i miss him.

went to marina barrage. beautiful view there.

i didnt know kites were in fashion.

need to go do physics for tmrw's lecture... hmm... (:

usher is hot. and i like this song. its an old song but his voice is just so soothing here. idk why

Lately I have been questioning and

What we have is loss yeah I heard it in your voice

That we were fighting

Tell me where it’s gone

Girl I thought that we could talk about whatever

Any problems that we had, we always worked it together

Did I say or is this something I’ve done wrong

Maybe I should know, but I don’t

Still I wanna make it better

If something hurting you then girl let me know

If it’s me than baby tell me

You don’t have to ignore

You don’t want this anymore

Just don’t let me be the last to know

Honestly you got me torn (and im so confused)

Cause now a days you got a new attitude

And you, barely answer my calls (but when I finally get through)

You rush of the line, like I don’t matter to you

Was there something I said, girl what did I do? (What have I done?)

If there’s a problem it ain’t hard for us to work it out.

Together, no different from what we’ve been through before.

I can’t move on, and I won’t, until we make it better.

If something hurting you then girl let me know

If it’s me then baby tell me

You don’t have to ignore

You don’t want this anymore

Just don’t let me be the last to know

I never believe we go this far

Don’t you let people tear what we have apart?

So girl don’t do it

If something hurting you then girl let me know

If it’s me then baby tell me

You don’t have to ignore

You don’t want this anymore

Just don’t let me be the last to know

2009-06-04T09:19:00.002+08:00

today's raffles place really concluded the finishing end of pre-u sem for us SPFs. we really SURVIVED campus chase lol. me and fashiha walked through seven rounds of the Prince Georges Park (PGP) Campus, one of the more luxurious campus in NUS... but according to faus, they look nice outside but super small inside. lol.

eh ben really missed all e fun (: and yesterday we went to SENTOSA for BEACH FIESTA. we BEACHIES (as dave would like to label us) got darling davey a card. and seriously, i think im gonna miss dave and the fellow beachies. but i think i'll be happy to have the rest of my june hols as un-kecoh as possible. A Levels ah beb!

anyways im leaving for raffles place in an hours time for the last segment of our SPF duty- Developing a Nation... i was super scared i wouldnt wake up after ytd actually coz we reached Wdl @ 9. but ahmed woke me up at 6.30 (but i fell back asleep again. heh)

i miss Boon2. ):

till then.

2009-05-31T11:09:00.005+08:00

ohmygod i forgot to blog abt last weekend.

me towering over dian. thanks babe (:

competition really gave me alot of insights on my life n all. n im glad i joined. i need to lose weight real soon.

hahahahahaha LOL
my favourite picture ever. fuiyohh macam jackie chan. better than him ok!

guess who supported me that day? came all the way to bedok to give me moral support. awwwwwwwwwww

crazy pictures of the other silat ppl. yes, thats a centipede on her head.

omg... so cute lah she!

adam being super retarded. i think he's secretly a camwhore. o.0 my cam's full of pictures of him. *ahem ahem* ai*cough cough cough*sha*cough cough*

our amazing friendly neighbourhood Team Manager(s)

i miss my babe!

this week ive been super busy with PreU Seminar. wish me luck otey (: next week will be the REAL pre-u seminar 2009, proudly organized by Innova Junior College (: three more days of PUS, and then say bye bye! (:

cool shit badge!

aisyah's theory of conflicting happiness goals
my dada's bdae on monday 25/5
no wonder im so fat

cute right?

i miss aisha and dian ):

im done! gonna study soon. btw trying to do periodicity. everytime i read the chap, i get big big headaches. ouch!idk why. i think its too much content memorisation.

back to group 2. sigh.

2009-05-25T12:02:00.003+08:00

Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye

I miss that town
I miss the faces
You can't erase
You can't replace it
I miss it now
I can't believe it

So hard to stay
Too hard to leave it

What happened to the good old days?
What happened to you and me?
What happened to fattening ourselves up at KFC?
What happened to mugging late at night until my mum calls up and shoot me?

What happened to walking around Esplanade like lost kids?
What happened to hanging out in the toilet acting like lost bitches?
What happened to us owning our hometown?
What happened to gossiping about the good old days?
What happened to innocent decent friends?

What happened to hanging out at BPP Garden Plaza?
What happened to baked rice under the sun and bubble tea?
What happened to the stupid childish fights that we have?
What happened to long walks and little love letters?
What happened to pulling me out of the library?

What happened to being just us?
What changed?
Most importantly, did i change?

2009-05-23T10:07:00.003+08:00

im sorry for scolding you ytd ): was really really really tired. this week's been crazy, thats all. thank you for being very patient and understanding wit me. i know sometimes im not an easy person to read minds with. ily. (:

2009-05-20T05:36:00.005+08:00

Far Away - Nickelback

I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

2009-05-17T05:26:00.002+08:00

ONE THING:

i know that some people DONT believe that im having probs with my phone such that sometimes i dont get smses and calls, cause my phone will sometimes automatically be okay the next day. its not my fault okay. maybe my phone was exhausted one day and then when charged become okay. I DONT KNOW! this is a general message going out to everyone; if i dont reply you back, it might mean that i cant get your sms. so why cant you just call my hp or my house number, instead of smsing me 5 times telling me to reply your sms. stupid shit rite? eventually i will reply your sms what. cannot be i take 2-3 days to reply your smses. then there must be something wrong with my phone.

yeah, if you dont believe that i didnt get your sms, then maybe you're not my friend. coz friends suppose to believe in each other. and if you think i will ignore you on something like this, im not like that lah seriously. i will get blur and sometimes i dont pick up my calls, but when i find that my phone gets missed calls i will call the person back come day or night. and if you guys STILL wanna scold me and all that for not fixing my phone, why dont you give me money so that i can buy a new phone and not berrate me when i SO announce to the whole world that there's something wrong with my phone. its been like weeks! dont tell me you still havent got a clue!

i aint pinpointing this to anyone. but if you terasa, then seriously too bad. like that just leave me out, if i dont reply your smses. let me be anti-social or sumth. i dont mind.

and i have nocturnal habits. i sleep like 8-9pm and then wake up at like 2-3 am plus. so if you sms me about something related to school the next day i wont sms cause by the time i wake up you would be sleeping anyway and the event will happen in a few hours time. please forgive me for that cause i really cant change my sleeping habit no matter what i do.

and im NOT your secretary. im just the fucking econs rep. i collect like what, a monthly of $20-30 per person? not my fault, blame the school. and what? am i suppose to sms you guys everytime there's hw? or there's something to do w lecture? hmm... who is responsible for your education, you and me? other subject reps just hand out lecture notes, they dont really sms you unless they need money, so what makes me so special? just because econs have workloads? essays and case studies and tests and lecture notes? do i look like i can sms 22 people for fun everyday? bills la beb, bills.

sorry for ranting like this. you know i wish i dont have a phone. no wonder we humans are always have truckloads of problems. look at what technology brings.

oh and if you dont have my house number, ASK ME. i got two lines. the new line is connected to my broadband so its basically free. so if you cant get me on one line, there's always another line.

and im busy like hell, i got my life y'know. you cant expect me to sit around my com and entertain you. my time is limited.

i know im gonna lose friends like this, but whattheck. im exhausted of being aisyah the little chick who follows everyone's butts.

2009-05-14T18:59:00.003+08:00

yesh, i know im slow, but i just watched PS. I Love You. rented it from my sch library (yesh, our library rents chick flicks)... its a bit draggy but it made my computer table swamped with tissues (part of it due to my flu)... its so sad! ): but i love his irish accent.... LOLS! must watch! (unless you hate sad chick flicks)

im also halfway through reading Slumdog Millionaire... and i tell you the book's totally different from the movie... but the book's version seems better. the movie has a toned down version. thank god, really.

anyways, you gotta watch the movie! dang! and its not JUST a love movie. it tells a story of the life in the slums of India (however in a very toned down version) you cant judge a book by its movie!

the whole saga about the NMPs just shows how "open" Singapore is. despite the Western influence, we still manage to keep ourself on par as a conservative society. i say if you fit the qualifications, you can be part of the gang despite all the prejudice and brouhaha brewing. but hey, you live in Sg, i guess that's just the disadvantages to it. or maybe its just me, one representative of the young generations. haish. wtv.

2009-05-12T01:43:00.009+08:00

WARNING: Long post ahead

Mr Ng’s Buffet;
Last Friday rocks.

Let me just summarize this. The food was DAMNNN nice. There’s briyani, mee goreng, cereal prawn, mutton and chicken, chicken wings, squid (its so nice even my seafood-deprived bf might like it). And the desert was awesome, he even has sushi! He spent $892 on us. It was so touching lah can. Granted, he does this every year, but really, ive never seen a teacher who is so generous towards us. And he sure is a great chem teacher, though he likes to jump around during chem lessons.

and he gave us a chance to bond. ((: yay mr ng!

we tricked the guys to take a pic with us here, so we can splash water on them. haa!

my babes. utmost front: faiszah, followed by boonee, aisyah sr n jr, and faus n wanting at the back

full after mr ng's buffet. saf should be banned in singapore man. she's a threat to my social life with all the nonsensical pics she took of us. LOL!

the babes who've been with me since the start of last year.

omg! turn your attention to your utmost right! i cant believe lee teck did that pose!!!!

We were discussing about being rich and I wonder whether man’s ambitions are good or bad. Like Macbeth says,

“I have no spur

To prick the sides of my intent, but only

Vaulting ambition, which o'erleaps itself

And falls on the other.”

i guess it depends on what you do to achieve that ambition of yours, right? and how you take it once its achieved. though i really hope i lead a good life.

my next-in-line bimbo sister. yes, she was camwhoring.

Monday:Sentosa Trip

i tried to get back at saf, but sometimes i dont even need to try. -.-

it was quite a fun experience. i so LOVE the multi-level captain's ball, but the other stuff was all theory, and well, i hate theory. we had enough of that in jc.

dan, our instructor for group B: beach fiesta

ohhh!!!! i forgot to take the picture of the french guy with the cute french accent!!!! *swoons*

what a spoiler scenery.

webcaming. i dont see the purpose of buying a webcam though.

herman was webcaming and he was really stoning throughout.look up, look down, look at the cam and types out. o.0 retarded, i swear. (he's so gonna kill me for this. haha!)

anyways. last sunday was mummy's day. bought her a cake and sang her a song. i love my mum (: she's one of the most amazing woman i met. though she aint no politician, or the most influential woman in the whole of sg, she rocks big time. she's a leader in her force, she's career-minded but can still bring up 4 children, she's independent and she's a great mum. my friends who know my mum personally will know what i mean. she's like wonderwoman in a blue uniform. and most importantly, she's my wonder-woman.

i love you, mum. happy mothers day.

and i miss my b. (: i got reminded of him when the frenchie was talking about thomas edison and his 1000th time at lighting a light bulb. everytime we part, the feelings get stronger. n you're really an amazing person (: hoping that our fates will intertwine is not too much to ask, aint it?

2009-05-01T07:42:00.003+08:00

sometimes you dont know what is important to you anymore.

it just gets so hard to leave. the harder you fall, the harder you get hurt.

que sera sera. whatever will be will be.

oh n if you're online, nudge me. i need something intellectual to wake up my brains

Ne-Yo .this came from his album Year of The Gentleman. he's totally my fav singer ever.

2009-04-26T06:53:00.006+08:00

sorry i cant verse well in malay.

bukan rupa atau harta yang ku dambakan
cuma ketulusan hati dan kejujuran cinta.
(but i really like the squirrel... thanks! hehe)

trying to do homework but i just cant! gawd!!!! how do you stand doing 4 econs essay plus 21 short structured q!!! i cant!!! im going to vomit + faint wit all e work im doing...

anyways, i heard from my mum what happen on friday night... prior to the school's "if you get under 6 pts, your parents have to come for the ptm meeting (that makes everyone in my class)... there was a long queue cause SOMEBODY took half an hour to talk to just ONE parent... he was showing john sloman and econs lecture notes arnd... somebody please remind him he's the CG Tutor... not just the Econs Tutor... thats why everyone's scrambing to meet him... and he made my mum wait for nothing cause in the end she didnt see him... what a waste of 3 hours... everybody in my class was complaining about the supposed somebody... LOL! luckily i didnt come... i went to meet my other half... (:

im still in my video frenzy. anyway this singapore mcys ad is interesting... and really sad... "beautifully imperfect people"

anyways, im in love with these songs...

i think ciara got really good moves. especially her video on "Promise" you go girl!

SEXAAAAYYYY!!! and im not talking about ciara!!! *HINT HINT* he's so hot when he's angry... i dun mind smashing plates with him... lol...

sorry, love! this is what i drool at when you go to camp (though drooling at you would be weird... or any drooling for any other reasons whatsoever)... and faus... im a girl... not yet a WOMAN but soon to be (not half a girl) whatdyaexpect... you cant expect me to look at ciara or saf all the time can i... LOL!

and aisyah sr n faiszah... he's hot ok! plus sexy voice... major hunk factor! *drools* kwang3... nvm... everyone's entitled to his or her own opinions... sheesh!

someone drag me to run... please...

2009-04-26T05:28:00.004+08:00

You will be happy that you read this all the way through. As you got up this morning, I watched you, and hoped you would talk to me, even if it was just a few words, asking my opinion or thanking me for something good that happened in your life yesterday. But I noticed you were too busy, trying to find the right outfit to wear. When you ran around the house getting ready, I knew there would be a few minutes for you to stop and say hello, but you were too busy. At one point you had to wait, fifteen minutes with nothing to do except sit in a chair. Then I saw you spring to your feet. I thought you wanted to talk to me, but you ran to the phone and called a friend to get the latest gossip instead. I watched patiently all day long. With all your activities I guess you were too busy to say anything to me.

I noticed that before lunch you looked around, may be you felt embarrassed to talk to me, that is why you didn't bow your head. You glanced three or four tables over and you noticed some of your friends talking to me briefly before they ate, but you didn't. That's okay. There is still more time left, and I hope that you will talk to me yet. You went home and it seems as if you had lots of things to do. After a few of them were done, you turned on the TV. I don't know if you like TV or not, just about anything goes there and you spend lot of time each day in front of it not thinking about anything, just enjoying the show. I waited patiently again as you watched the TV and ate your meal, but again you didn't talk to me.

Bedtime I guess you felt too tired. After you said good night to your family you popped into bed and fell asleep in no time. That's okay because you may not realize that I am always there for you. I've got patience, more than you will ever know. I even want to teach you how to be patient with others as well.

I love you so much that I wait everyday for a nod, prayer or thought or a thankful part of your heart. It is hard to have a one-sided conversation. Well, you are getting up once again. And once again I will wait, with nothing but love for you. Hoping that today you will give me some time. Have a nice day!

Your friend, ALLAH

PS - Do you have enough time to send this to another person? If you aren't ashamed to do this, please follow the directions. Not ashamed? Pass this on......only if you mean it. Yes, I do Love God. He is my source of existence and Savior. Allah keeps me functioning each and everyday. Without Him, I will be nothing. Without him, I am nothing, but with Him This is the simplest test . . . if you Love God, and are not ashamed of all the marvelous things he has done for you. Send this to your list!

i feel deeply ashamed of myself after reading this.

i was watching youtube on bionic burgers... anyways i really saw some interesting vids posted at the end of this post... so do check them out cause they're not only interesting, they kinda tell us some real stuff thats happening arnd the world :D gawd i sound like mr sim... anyways the Mouth Revolution is the funniest one ever!

Mouth Revolution

HAHAHAHAHA!! "we, the mouths, are staging an international shut-up..." hahahahaha!!!

anyways, prior to the bionic burgers video, im trying not to consume any MacBurgers or MacNuggets or MacCokes or i might MacPuke or get MacDiseases... LOL! watching Super Size Me was really an eye-opener... its really a MacWorld... they are taking over our world... franchises everywhere... nooooo! (oh, btw, i was forced to eat at Macs cause i was studying with benjy at MacD... which is dammnnn contradicting i know... but i gotta live in this country yknow.. hell and damn... pardon my french)

so yeah... the Bionic Burger vid was abt this guy who bought a McD burger and kept it in his jacket pocket for one year... and when he open it after a year, the burger looked the same as before... until then he kept a collection of McBurgers... that was 18 years ago... after some years... the burgers look the same as they do before... do you ever wonder how much preservatives do they put inside the burger... its damn shit scary i tell you...!

anyways if you plan to watch the Meatrix or the Bionic Burger video... just think twice cause it will make you think twice about what we're putting inside our mouths... its really disgusting! and to think we dont even know what we put inside our mouth cause there's no label for GM foods... its like a slippery slope and you really cant run away from anything... unless you go grow your own food... but i warned you... enough said. err... have fun!

Bionic Burgers

The Sophie Neveu in this vid has a real cute French accent... lol

2009-04-22T04:45:00.002+08:00

yeah, im a bitch, so what?

maybe im a bitch, thats why you should never come near to me ever again.

wait... im sorry about everything cause its my fault, truly. i shall be 100% to be blamed. cause seriously, the whole reason for my existence is to care for one person only. REALLY. i dont have a life of my own.

maybe im sick of becoming someone else's puppy dog.

or maybe ive decided to grow brains.

btw, henry flew away. even though at some nights i feel like shooting the damn bird, i miss the little yellow thing fluttering around the table or walking on me when im sleeping. sigh. but i suspect ayu let him go cause she starts to understand the meaning of liberty for a bird. cool kid. she's so like me. :p

2009-04-19T09:44:00.001+08:00

emotional turmoil.

tiredtiredtiredtiredtiredtiredtiredtired

the world does not revolve around you, seriously

2009-04-08T01:47:00.002+08:00

WE CANT DECIDE ON OUR DESTINY, BUT WE CAN CHOOSE THE PATH IT GOES.

NO I AM NOT USING LITERARY METHOD OF EMPHASING MY POINT BY CAPITALIZING. MY KEYBOARD IS SPOILT! AND AS A RESULT, HALF OF MY GP WRITE-UP IS CAPITALIZED. BLOODY SHET. DESPERATE TIMES CALL FOR DESPERATE MEASURES. I CANT EVEN TYPE MY MORNING BROADCAST OUT. DAAAAAAANG.

I SHALL USE THIS TO CONCENTRATE MY STUDIES. (: YAY ME! MELLISA LEE LING NING, DONT YOU DARE DISTURB ME IN MY EFFORTS TO BE A GOODY-GOODY RESPONSIBLE STUDENT OF IJC. WARNING EH! HAHA (:

THE FEELING WONT GO AWAY. MAYBE TOMORROW.

2009-04-04T09:52:00.002+08:00

Beautiful - Akon

it doesnt feel like saturday.

Remember those walls I built?
Well, baby they are tumbling down
And they didn't even put up a fight
They didn't even make a sound
I found a way to let you in
But, I never really had a doubt
Standing in the light of your halo
I got my angel now

It's like I've been awakened
Every rule I had, you break it
It's the risk that I'm taking
I ain't never gonna shut you out

Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby, I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby, I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away

I can feel your halo
I can see your halo
I can feel your halo
I can see your halo
Halo, ooh ooh.....

Hit me like a ray of sun
Burning through my darkest night
You're the only one that I want
Think I'm addicted to your light
I swore I'd never fall again
But this don't even feel like falling
Gravity can't forget
To pull me back to the ground again

-Beyonce

2009-03-28T23:45:00.006+08:00

hello :D

on economics assignment call. writing a 25m-essay abt recession with dearest faiszah and germs. erghhhh. the damned gonna kill me.

my baby is right. (: some things are just not that important. not worth fighting for.

tired. wanna sleep but i wanna finish some things.

sacrifices. throwing away the stuff you use to have, and focusing on yourself. is this what i was supposed to do for a's?? feel so demoralised. trying and trying so hard but you just cant get the results you want.

i know its not all about the marks but its really lowering my self-esteem.

spent the day with my little toots. they are seriously a hoot. and damned cute cause they accompanied me 1/2 of my night run. i wish they have 2.4km at night. since i think better at night, i might run better at night. if i dont fall asleep first.

im glad having you around for the past weeks (: and i dont think i will ever regret even if we lose each other in this lifetime. :D you make me wanna change into a better person. like a fallen angel from heaven's gates, gracing me with your divine presence.

oh man, im turning cornier by the second.

ok back to recession. gah.

oh, and if you're a chicken and you throw threats like, "im going to make your life miserable from now on" and expect me to give you some leeway, dream on. if my baby doesnt kill you first, i'll do the job myself. dont fuck around with me, im seriously fucking trying to be bloody patient with you ks.

i know in alot of ways, i deserve that. call me a slut or a bitch or anything. i may be needy in alot of ways to the extent that i "change guys fast" but i dont hurt my friends, i dont give them problems. i dont cheat or two-time, and when im with one, i stick with one. basic loyalty manz. so what is it that you're not happy about? why cant you just let me live my life?

i respect that cause i know im like that. i dont give a fucking damn. even when friends tell me stuff like that, i just throw it aside, what makes you think i care when you say that? but its THIS slut/bitch that you're looking for. so dont try to heal your ego by throwing it on me. dont be such an egoistic bastard, live with it and leave me.

2009-03-16T15:48:00.005+08:00

i look dumb-tastic. these two are taken at different days.

1st pic was when we went to climb this seriously cool obstacle course. it was damn dark but we ended up having a lot of fun. we were slapping each other's butts cause all of couldnt see. ive sinned too many times that day. o.0 slapping faiszah's butt too many times made me realise lesbianism wont be fun if its with her. -_- (not that i have ever considered it) once we made a wrong turn and fell down a room full of balls! but we finished in 10 mins tops. faiszah was like damned funny.

2nd pic was one of those times during PE where we DREAD and DREAD about running our 2.4 and start singing in hopes of it raining... (lame i know... bdk innova jc lah katakan) there was a really beautiful rainbow at woodlands the day before and there were mushrooms growing in our school field due to the raining season. unfortunately alot of the pics i cant upload cause my phone "konk"ed out so yeah. :D we were actually making stupid poses to waste our time. hehe. :D

hahahahaha! faiszah looks like a misplaced cheerleader.

<
Mad - NeYo

ive watched this video too many times! but it has a nice touch to it &amp its really sad shit man. me and faiszah kept playing this video in the com lab last time. bottom line: cherish the ones you love before its too late.

block test is next week and i really think i have not done much. i feel so kuku these days. i dont believe that you need to study/mug like shit everyday but seriously, it seems that everyone is doing it in my school. and im starting to feel like a damn mugger. seriously, is this what Singapore's education is teaching us? (and then when i say, "dont be such a damn mugger lah", they go, "you're smart what, you dont need to study" so i shall shut up and keep my opinions to myself)

im putting myself on experiment mode. if it works well, THIS is how im gonna study for A's.

i have NO life. bold, italics, underline that.

guys, please take care of yourself at this crucial time. dont over-work, and always love and believe yourself! (this esp goes out to the Managing Director of NMA... ahem ahem...)

yours truly,

siti aisyah alzahar (:

Girl - Destinys Child

2009-02-27T05:57:00.006+08:00

i got an hour to go before i have to leave for sch... and since im in no mood for homework... i'll post up some pics... some of these were taken waaaaaay long back but i thought some of them were cute so yahhh...

they were ALL sitting on me when we took this picture... ARGGGGH!

he only knows how to eat... tsk !

hi andrianna! welcome to the family! ((:

ok thats all for now? havent upload the pe pictures.

i got some things to say:

MEL

read your blog... i understand that ur not happy wit the cina bodek... you might be feeling worse than me cause you're not in the same class as him... but thats life! we just accept it and make the best out of it. no more hoohas please! i think you should peace with the cina bodek. at least tell her that you want to make peace with the cina bodek... dont angry so much lei! (:

FAUS N YAT

im sorry if i have abadoned you guys these days... not in the right state of mind... tired and all )):

SAF N BOON EE

stop scandaling behind my back! i love you saf!

haha... lately ive been in a complicated rship with saf... please DONOT misunderstood us... both of us are in reality straight no matter what we say or what we (ahem) do in class.

i just detest love and all... i look at guys like girls now... and even girls like guys! (saf.... <33333>

k peace out! have fun in sch, dudes and dudettes! babes and babettes! haha...